Parenting Tip of the Week: Engage in Their Interests
- Eddie Shin, LMFT
- Jun 9
- 3 min read
Parenting is hard, especially in the busy world that we live in. Applying these small and simple skills each week will help you in your journey of parenting and build connection with your children and/or teens!
One of the most powerful ways to strengthen your connection with your child or teen is by showing genuine interest in the things they love. Whether it’s finger painting, video games, or skateboarding, stepping into their world—even briefly—tells them one important thing: what matters to you, matters to me.
For Young Children: Play Is Connection
Young kids express themselves through play, and when you join in, it becomes a natural bridge for connection and communication. This doesn’t mean you need to be excited about coloring inside the lines or stacking blocks for the hundredth time—but showing up with curiosity and attention is key.
Sit down beside them and pick up a crayon or a toy. Ask playful questions like, “What color should we make the dinosaur?” or “Can I be the dragon guarding the castle?” These questions invite them to share their imagination with you, making them feel seen and valued. Children love it when adults participate in their imaginary games. It tells them their ideas are important and worth your time. These playful interactions also lay the foundation for emotional safety, where they’ll be more likely to talk to you about bigger things as they grow.
For Older Kids and Teens: Join Their World, Judgment-Free
As kids grow, their interests become more defined—and sometimes more distant from your own. It might be harder to relate to video games, K-pop, or YouTube trends. But taking the time to sit beside them as they game, asking about their favorite artists, or watching a movie they love without judgment goes a long way. Even if it’s not your style, your willingness to participate says, I care about you, not just the things we have in common.
For example, if your teen loves gaming, ask them to show you how to play. You don’t have to be good at it—in fact, a little clumsiness can lead to shared laughter and low-pressure bonding. If they love music, put on their favorite playlist in the car and ask about the lyrics or the beat. If they’re into fitness, try joining them for a workout, a jog, or a game of catch.
Activities like these create parallel play moments—where you're doing something side by side, which often feels less confrontational and more comfortable for teens. These moments can lead to spontaneous conversations about their friends, school, or what’s on their mind.
The Power of Shared Interests
Engaging in your child’s interests doesn’t mean you have to turn into their best friend or share every hobby. But it does mean making the effort to step into their shoes for a little while. When you do, you demonstrate empathy, respect, and a willingness to meet them where they are.
Ultimately, this builds trust and encourages openness—key ingredients in any strong parent-child relationship. So whether it’s a ten-minute tea party or a weekend basketball game, small moments of interest can lead to big moments of connection.
Check out Playful Connection Podcast for more tips each Monday morning!
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